Podcast 25: 6 Ways to Bring Gratitude Into Your Life

In this Thanksgiving edition of The Daily Saint podcast, we discuss 6 ways to bring gratitude into your life.  Each of us knows what it feels like to be grateful but how do you make it a regular practice?  

Shownotes include:

• ShrinkingTheCamel.com and author Jim Wood.  Jim's new e-Book, At Work as it is in Heaven, can be found here.
• LifeOfASteward.com.  Loren Pinilis has an excellent take on time management and his new podcast is great.
• Michael Hyatt's post, The 7 Benefits of Keeping a Daily Journal 
• My post on life, post-Hurricane Sandy, What I Learned From a Week Without Power
• Seth Godin's book, Linchpin: Are You Indispensable?

 Photo courtesy of SG

Listen to the Podcast

What I Learned From a Week Without Power

I write this post hesitantly.  There’s this little voice that feels guilty even reflecting on “blessings” when so many of my closest friends are still without power, heat and running water. 

Hurricane Sandy came and went but left her mark, that she did.

There is also a sense of quick relief, maybe too quick, because our “normal lifestyle” has been restored and is now almost like it was prior to the hurricane.  Our minds are so well trained to seek pleasure that I can feel the pain of last week drifting away.  I want to put it out of my mind and download some dumb computer game while turning on all of the lights in my house and streaming live video on my iPad.

But I also don’t want to forget.  Not at all.

I don’t want to forget last week.  I don’t want to because a part of me feels guilty because of what has been restored to my own family.  Lights.  Heat.  Hot water.  Internet.  More importantly, I don’t want to forget because, for one small stretch of life, I could relate to the poor.  We were poor in heat, lights, food, comfort, and leisure.

It didn't feel good.

On the other hand, we were rich at the same exact time.  We were wealthy in how much more we spoke with our neighbors. We were rich in how we tried to encourage each other when one of us felt like complaining.  We were rich in the time that it took to prepare meals.  With the microwave out of commission, simple meals of bread and soup came alive thanks to the help of a side burner on the bbq grille.  

For five long days, we were rich while at the same time being poor.

I kept a candle lit tonight after dinner.  My eight year old reminded me that our power was back and we didn’t need the candles any more.  I told him that I didn’t want to forget last week.  Innocently and honestly, he said, “I don’t want to remember last week at all!  It was horrible.”  He is, of course, very right.  One would never choose to be out of power for a week.  Why would you?

Suffering is like that.  It repels and attracts at the same time. We walk by homeless people and simultaneously want to stare and look away.  Can you relate to that?  For many thousands of people in New York, Connecticut and New Jersey after the hurricane, the response is the same.  Some just want to move on and forget that it all happened, like my eight year old.  Others will have to live with the devastation for months or years to come.  

So what did I learn from a week without power?  First, what I missed the most:

1. The ability to communicate with my friends and colleagues.

2. Hot coffee at any time of the day.

3. High speed internet.

4. Heat and afternoon lighting.

5. The ability to charge my devices.

6. Podcast listening during my commute.

What didn’t I miss?  (And some of these may surprise you!)

1. Refrigeration.

2. TV.

3. All Saints Day.  It’s not that I don’t like All Saints Day, I do.  It’s rather that I was so consumed with getting my family through the day that we had forgotten all about All Saints.  

What have I learned through all of this?  

1. Take nothing for granted.  Not your family or a good night’s sleep or a warm meal.  It could all go away in the blink of an eye so cherish it, hold it close to you and thank God for whatever you have.

2. Help those that you can.  I can’t cook my way out of a paper bag but I can brew coffee.  Today I made a pot of coffee for someone without power and poured it into a carafe.  When I gave it to my friend, she could only give back a hug which was way better than what I had to offer.

3. Put more stock into routines.  They bring momentum which brings success.  During a time of disaster, they also bring order, calm and a sense of stability. Get really good at them because they matter a whole lot. 

4. Try not to forget.  Whether you light a candle, frame a photo or keep a quote in your wallet or purse, remembering tragedy is very, very important.  It keeps you humble and helps to avoid careless waste.

I’d love to hear your insights from last week’s Hurricane event.  How are you doing and what are you learning?

Photo courtesy of AB

10 Ways to Get Unstuck

I ran into someone the other day at a meeting and asked him how he was doing.  He responded in what I thought was a sad manner, "Same old, same old.  Just plugging along I guess."

Imagine going through your life with that "same old" mindset and yet that's what so many people do.

At the heart of this rather depressing outlook on life (and work) is a perspective of scarcity.  Rather than having an attitude of abundance and gratitude, my friend sees his days as a repeatingly boring cycle that repeats itself every day.  I feel badly for him, I really do.

Can you relate?  If so, how do you break up a cycle of monotony like that of my friend?  Here are 10 easy ways to put some zing into your weekly schedule:

1. Change your commute.
2. Change your morning routine.
3. Eat slower.
4. Send someone a personal note.
5. Pay someone a compliment.
6. Take a nap.
7. Enjoy a slow glass of wine.
8. Go for a nighttime walk.
9. Tidy up your workspace.
10. Wear something fun.

These suggestions do not work every time but they do help you to be more reflective.  Reflective people typically are more happy.  When you feel stuck in your daily schedule, a simple tweak can create a dent in the monotony that is a part of all of our lives.

God is there to be found in the world of work.

I really like the following quote from former president of Boston College, Fr. William Byron, S.J. because it speaks to the ordinary nature of daily life, "God is there to be found in the world of work. The daily finding of God in the things of work can deepen one’s faith and quite literally ground it in the familiar reality that becomes an altar from which an offering of praise and thanks is made."

Here's to your daily altar to God, that is to say the ordinary stuff that fills your day.  May you be unstuck through small changes.

Question: which of the 10 actions above have you tried recently?

Photo courtesy of FDP

Four Methods for a More Consistent Relationship with God

Faith takes practice and the practice of faith takes perseverance.  As St. James says, “The testing of your faith develops perseverance.”  (1:3)  I get all of this and yet the practice of my faith can be so darn frustrating.  The lyrics from Bruce Springsteen come to mind, “One step up and two steps back”. (One Step Up)

Like the kids in my own family, sometimes I just don’t get it.  “The habits should have kicked in by now,” I tell myself, when I get frustrated as I try to carve out time for daily prayer.  One would think that a Christian, almost 40 years old, would be running on all cylinders.  Maybe yes and maybe no.  

Why does this bother me at all?  Seriously, very few people have daily prayer times if we stopped long enough to ask them.  I should be happy that I’m trying to pray on a regular basis.

Or should I?

Should sporadic spiritual practice be good enough for God?  Does He expect that every single day is marked with rosaries and Bible reading?  Come on God, isn’t there a place for slackers in the spiritual life?

One person who was far from a slacker was Blessed Theresa of the slums of Calcutta.  She once said, “God doesn’t require us to succeed; he only requires that you try.”  When you look at it this way, it could be that effort matters as much as the momentum that one builds up in his/her spiritual life.  That’s anti-slacker material if I ever heard it.

“God doesn’t require us to succeed; he only requires that you try"

So here’s my formula for avoiding slackerdom in the spiritual life:

1. Try to pray every day.  Quietly, without fanfare, including the practice of journaling when possible.  Try and then after you mess up or just forget, try again.

2. Read your Bible.  A little a day goes an awful long way.  A “pericope” is a short snippet of text.  Find some and ponder it by sitting with it in your head.

3. Talk out loud to God.  Every time I do this I’m reminded that faith is about relationship above all else.  You’ll feel funny at first but trust me, this works- big time.  If you can get comfortable talking to God, you may find that God ends up talking to you!

4. Seek perspective from wise and holy people.  Use a spiritual director, cherish your holy friends and ask their advice.  There's little that they haven't seen in life.

Let’s be honest, being a person of faith takes work. When we hit the speedbumps and feel less than motivated, it can be tempting to quit or get down on ourselves. Still, it’s important to remember that we’re in this first for God and second for ourselves.  

If you’re feeling like a slacker, that’s the perfect time to go “back to work” on the four disciplines laid out above and beg for God to bolster your resolve.

Which of the four disciplines speak most to your spiritual life?

Photo courtesy of RR

How to Cut Down on Your Errands

Would you like to reduce your weekend errands so that you have more time for your family or friends?  Do you have a list of errands that you just wish someone else could do for you?  Better yet, would you like to find a simpler way to organize your errands? 

I hate errands. Actually if I'm honest, I really don't hate them. I just don't like it when they take up time that I'd rather spend doing something of more value.  Stuff like being with Cary and the kids or working at school.

There are usually two kinds of errands:

• those you can complete on your way to something else
• those that take up dedicated, focused energy

It's the second kind that usually gets in the way. These errands are unique and time consuming. We tend to put them off because we either don't know how to tackle them or find them unpleasant.

I experience this about every three months. I blame the oil change light in my Toyota but really the blame falls on my shoulders.

For whatever reason, I haven't mastered the concept of the oil change. I get it done but typically about a thousand miles over when I should. I have a ton of excuses but most of them are lame (the garage is far from work, forgetfulness, the non-urgency of the task, etc.).

Besides the inconvenience of errands like an oil change, they typically don't produce a high level of joy or satisfaction. I mean, who truly loves another trip to Doug's Auto Garage?  

So what to do?

This week we're inviting all readers (and listeners of the podcast) to take part in a reduction of errands.  My kids think that this is totally nerdy but they actually are the ones who benefit the most from me doing less errands on the weekend.  

Who really wants to spend 30-40% of their free time running errands? I know that I don't so here are some suggestions that can reduce your errands by 25% or more:

1. Hire a personal assistant: if your errands are digital (preparing taxes, scanning documents, etc.), why not hire a Virtual Assistant? With resources like ODesk.com or Elance.com, you can find a "V.A." in about 15 minutes at very low cost. If your errands are geographically dependent, you can find help through a resource like CraigsList.com or through word of mouth. Some might object that spending the money to have someone pick up your dry cleaning is wasteful but ask yourself, "What is my time really worth?" Hiring someone might free you up to spend time on better things.  Mike Hyatt has a solid resource on the reasons for going V.A. in order to save you personal time on tasks.  You may also be able to find a neighbor, a retired person or just someone looking for a few hours a week who could help you.
2. Buy more gift cards: think of all of the time that you spend trying to find that "perfect gift" for someone's birthday. I suggest skipping this and just buying a gift card or a gift certificate. This might not work for every situation but it is a super option more often than not. Best of all, it will save you a ton of time.  I have a wedding coming up and while I wouldn't recommend a gift card in that situation, I'll be giving cash for sure.
3. Simplify your yard: look at it this way- you could spend two hours mowing your lawn or you could install some ornamental grasses and perennial flowers that require no maintenance and still look nice. The result- you only have to mow for one hour a week, saving you 40 hours a year. Now that's a trade-off worth making.  The less maintenance, the better.
4. Simplify your wardrobe: most of us only need 5-10 different outfits for work and about the same for casual wear. Start by weeding out old stuff that you haven't worn in years. Then settle on a few brands that you like and invest in quality items. I like Joseph A. Bank for my dress clothes and Timberland for my casual clothes. This has saved me so much time and stress in that I don't have to shop for new items nearly as often because both brands design clothes to last for years.
5. Just don't do them: when all else fails, skip the errands. There is a cost to this for sure but you might actually get away with not doing some of the things that you dread and are taking up your valuable personal time.  Use caution with this one but always ask yourself, "Do I really need to do that errand?"

What can you do this week to cut down on errands?

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Photo courtesy of FDP