Slowdown Friday: The ABC's of Weekend Relaxing

By the time Friday rolls around in an average week, there is a spring in my step as I know that (barring any weekend work scenario) I'll be able to relax with my family.  This is great for my spirits but can actually hinder the quality of my work on a Friday.  I know that I need to stay focused, keep moving and use Friday as an important "bookend" of the week.  As they say, "it's not who starts the game that matters but who's on the floor at the end."

The great Trappist monk Thomas Merton wrote in New Seeds of Contemplation that

"the secret of interior peace is detachment". 

As we seek to experience two days of peace, relaxation and time with family and friends, it's good to detach from work and reconnect with what's important.  Here are some suggestions:

A  acknowledge that rest is good. While our American culture preaches speed, let's go deeper and turn off the noise and distractions for a few days.  Speed is good but only when it's balanced with detachment and "pulling back" from the Monday-thru-Friday.  I always feel pumped up after I've taken some time for rest.

B  become a Sabbath taker.  Sabbath is a concept that anyone can practice, whether religious or not.  It's simply the art of taking time to rest, reconnect with family and friends and do something fun.  I generally teach that sabbath is a means to an end.  Just like a family vacation, sabbath rejuvenates you so that you're ready to engage once again in whatever work or career you've chosen.  Sabbath isn't an end in and of itself but a tool that we can use on a weekly basis.

C  cultivate silence.  I know, I know this is tough!  What I also know is that the amount of noise we face on any given day is deafening.  Take a walk.  Turn off the TV.  Drive alone.  Go for a bike and listen to the wind.  Sit by yourself. 

Hopefully Merton is correct in his belief that interior peace comes from stepping back and refocusing on what's really important.  Have a great weekend.

(by the way, the photo at the top of the page is one I took at a Trappist monastery last summer in Spencer, MA)

Resources for the Road
Taking Sabbath
Mark Buchanon on how difficult it can be to take a day of rest
Duke University promotes keeping sabbath
Taking a "power sabbath"

6 Ways to Overcome Procrastination

Part II in a series on “dangerous P’s”.

Yesterday we looked at the danger of perfectionism and today
we’ll focus on another threat to personal productivity: procrastination. Procrastination is defined as “to put off till
another day or time; defer; delay” and can paralyze even the best of
us. Without a strong defense of personal
habits that propel success, procrastination can sidetrack a good project and
make mincemeat out of a busy schedule.

First, a personal note on procrastination: I am a recovering
procrastinator. It’s out there, I admit
it! Like someone with a substance abuse
issue, I am never fully cured but see myself as a “work in progress”. I admit that I enjoy procrastinating for what
it provides in the moment.

The In-The-Moment Feeling

Let’s face it, we wouldn’t put things off unless it felt
good on some level. I don’t have to deal with that right now… Unfortunately, putting
things off always comes back to haunt us. Like the bad knee that needs replacement or the fractured relationship
in need of repair, we put off things that are uncomfortable or perceived as “too
hard”.

Hiders or Pilers

Most of us deal with difficult tasks in one of two ways: we
hide them or pile them up. Hiders don’t
want to deal with things and put them out of sight. Pilers can bear seeing them and walk by them
in an attempt to ignore or defer responsibility for the task. I tend to hide more than pile so for me I need
to force myself to tackle things before they tempt for me to hide them. Filing paperwork is one of the things that I
hate to do so I try to file things as I go rather than let them pile up.

Strategies for Overcoming Procrastination

1. Map it out. Draw on paper or a
        writing board what the project will look like. Just putting it down in bubbles or
        squares will help your brain understand the project and what it takes to get
        it done.



2. Write it down. Get into the habit
        of writing things down, no matter the stage of the game. Don’t let a thought escape when it comes
        to getting something done. For
        example, if you have a birthday party coming up and have a quick thought
        about what Sheila will like for her big day, write it down. A few weeks later, when you are shopping
        for her, you’re much more likely to press the “recall” button and find
        that perfect gift.



3. Ask, “what’s the next action?” Momentum is super important when it comes to productivity. If you can honestly figure out what the
        absolute next step is in a given project, the likelihood of success if
        increased exponentially.



4. Tell
   someone about it. Why not “go
        public” with a tendency to put things off. Having a workout partner practically ensures that you’ll go to the
        gym so why not replicate this with your work habits?



5. Identify patterns. If you hate to
        file paperwork, recognize this and attack it with zeal. If shopping for gifts is something you
        detest, figure out a different way of doing it.  Some people with social anxiety find
        internet shopping a great way to get things done. The more patterns you can figure out,
        the more you can solve. They may
        never disappear entirely but you’ll be able to make some serious progress.



6. Review your project list often. Stay on top of your 30, 50 or 100 life projects. Look at this list weekly and keep the
        momentum in high gear. If you can’t
        deal with something in the next week, schedule a time when you will be
        able to dedicate more energy and creativity.

Resources for the Road

Dealing
with Procrastination

15
Simple Steps to Getting Things Done

Lazy
and Unmotivated?

3 Ways to Overcome Perfectionism

I once read that there are two deadly P's in seeking the zone-like occasion of productivity: procrastination and perfectionism.  Let's talk about the latter for a minute- what's so bad about wanting to get things perfect? 

1. Perfectionism convinces you that things must be absolutely, positively correct.  This myth only exists in some strange, far away land in which even the latest OS from Microsoft is perfect.  Last I checked, Microsoft's latest OS- even with several millions of beta testers, is far from perfect.  Things have to be done well but rarely do they have to be perfect.  Step one: accept a few flaws and realize that momentum is important at work- if your momentum and energy are getting bogged down by perfectionism, plow forward and save the critique for later.



2. Perfectionism paralyzes you to the point that you don't want to tackle important projects.  I once delayed the simple task of completing a contract for a day's retreat because I didn't like the retreat staff.  What projects have you been putting off for fear of not getting them "just right"?  Step two: practice the habit of next action thinking and always be working on the next step.



3. Perfectionism can make you difficult to work with. Let's face it- no one likes a know-it-all and most of the time those that must have things perfect are downright annoying.  Step three: don't take yourself so seriously.  We all have to work with
   one another so relax and accept a few flaws in yourself and in others.

Quotes for the road






Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.  ~Harriet Braiker





Certain flaws are necessary for the whole.  It would seem strange if old friends lacked certain quirks.  ~Goethe





No one is perfect... that's why pencils have erasers.  ~Author Unknown

(yes, that's me on the top of a 30 foot poll at retreat today- it wasn't perfect but I made it to the top!)

Notable Newsletters: Leadership, Joy at Work and Then Some

One of the best ways to stay on your game is to read and read well.  Besides great books on productivity and profiles in workplace success, I find that e-newsletters are very helpful.  Here is the latest list of quick-reads that you may find helpful as well.  If you really like the links, why not consider subscribing?

Mark Sanborn, April 2007 on Avoiding a Fall from Leadership

John Maxwell's Leadership Wired, on Leading from the Middle

Dennis Bakke, Joy At Work Journal on Leading to Joy

Master list of 16 Self Improvement Newsletters

Download Monday: Life Balance Handout

I'm back from some days of retreat for the seniors at Oratory Prep in Summit, NJ and onto two days of retreat for the juniors at Archbishop Curley in Baltimore, MD. 

Here's a quick handout on life balance which I've used in multiple workshops.  Have a great week!

Download BALANCE.pdf